Memories
Memories are a funny thing. And that is due to the way we, individually, process the information gathered in our surroundings. For example, when talking to survivors of a tramatic event, the overall story will be the same, but the details will differ, even if they saw the exact same thing. Our information processing is based on our own internal biases. If in the past we had a bad experience with a red headed woman, all subsequent experiences with women who look similar will be biased due to that one bad experience.
Why am I writing a post about memory formation? Well it's because I need to move passed some memories. I've posted before about a friend who I spent a few months avoiding. Recently they contacted me and I brought up issues I had with their previous behaviors which led to a brief discussion about memory and how it's different for two people because of experiences (and other factors). We both agreed we were not innocent in the actions creating the issues. And now it's time for me to put them to bed.
Dear Friend (you know who you are),
I am still hurt by the situation that lead to the "mess" as I will call it. I'm not bitter any more. Everyone deserves to be happy, and if you are that is awesome. I am still wary of letting you back into my life, but that is something that will take time to reach. But this is not going to be a rehash of everything. Time to move on.
I will say, I will always be curious about how you are getting on; that will likely never leave me. Even though I do have reservations about where you are currently, if you are happy that is all that matters. I do still consider you one of my closest friends, and not jsut geographically. I do hope you consider me the same.
At this time, I'm moving beyond so much and I have to thank you for letting me have the time I need. Not to destroy what I have already written, the nice sentiments and all, but I do have one request and it's been bugging me for quite some time. Could you be less critical of me and what I do? I know it's from a place of good intention and concern, but honestly a simple "good for you" is all that is needed at times.
In time I will trust you again. Until then, I'm putting the old memories aside and starting clean. I hope you will too.
Meghan
Why am I writing a post about memory formation? Well it's because I need to move passed some memories. I've posted before about a friend who I spent a few months avoiding. Recently they contacted me and I brought up issues I had with their previous behaviors which led to a brief discussion about memory and how it's different for two people because of experiences (and other factors). We both agreed we were not innocent in the actions creating the issues. And now it's time for me to put them to bed.
Dear Friend (you know who you are),
I am still hurt by the situation that lead to the "mess" as I will call it. I'm not bitter any more. Everyone deserves to be happy, and if you are that is awesome. I am still wary of letting you back into my life, but that is something that will take time to reach. But this is not going to be a rehash of everything. Time to move on.
I will say, I will always be curious about how you are getting on; that will likely never leave me. Even though I do have reservations about where you are currently, if you are happy that is all that matters. I do still consider you one of my closest friends, and not jsut geographically. I do hope you consider me the same.
At this time, I'm moving beyond so much and I have to thank you for letting me have the time I need. Not to destroy what I have already written, the nice sentiments and all, but I do have one request and it's been bugging me for quite some time. Could you be less critical of me and what I do? I know it's from a place of good intention and concern, but honestly a simple "good for you" is all that is needed at times.
In time I will trust you again. Until then, I'm putting the old memories aside and starting clean. I hope you will too.
Meghan
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